You Are Loved – Hadiya Brown

SAM_1138

Nothing But Blue Skies H.B.

7You were running a good race.

Who cut in on you to keep you from obeying the truth?

8That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you.

  ~ Galatians 5 NIV


I haven’t felt like myself lately. I don’t find joy in some of the things I used to. There are certain situations I cannot see as I pictured them before. And oddly enough, there are things that I used to do that I don’t desire to anymore. And I’m not always comfortable with or happy about what’s happening to me either. But I have accepted these things for what they are; I am being made new.


2
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

4Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

~James 1 NIV

 

I had a really great conversation with my mom the other day. I’ve been away for a while, and she pulled out her, “I’m still your Mother” card. Long story short, I was being “smiley me”. And smiley me causes no trouble because she don’t want none. She’s real nice all the time; always flashing those dimples and pretty white teeth. Smiley me is never ever upset about anything, and she especially doesn’t ever run home, huddle underneath the covers and completely fall apart. Because who would accept me then? Who would like me if I’m not always happy, gentile, homogenized and validating?


8
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways my ways,”

declares the Lord.

9“As the heavens are higher than the earth,

 so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts.

10 As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it

without watering the earth, and making it bud and flourish,

so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

11so is my word that goes out from my mouth:

It will not return to me empty,

but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

~Isaiah 55 NIV

 

Even before I was a mommy, I was always the nurturer within my circle of friends. I never resented this because it came naturally; I’ve always liked helping others. But it became harder for me to ask for it. I knew what everyone else was going through and my issues paled in comparison. I’ve carried that weight for a long time. My mother told me is was time to put it down. She said it was time for me to ask for what I need and to let people know when I need them, even if I have nothing to give in return.

The last thing my mommy told me is that she always prayed I would come to know God the way I do now. She told me that when I was growing up she could sometimes see I was having a hard time, but she was not always equipped to reach me, though she knew that God would; not that He could. She never stopped believing that He would change my heart and renew my mind (Ezekiel 36:25-27).

I can very vividly remember a time when I wanted to be nothing like my mother. I would sit at the kitchen table with her every morning, watching her study her bible while she ate her cereal and drank her coffee. And I was always so perplexed as to what could be so important about that book. Reading the bible made me angry because I never felt that any of it’s promises were meant for me. Maybe you can relate because you’ve felt it too. Surely the cross that you bear is not always easy to carry. Still, you need to know that He sees you. And yes, He knows everything about you. And despite what you may think or put yourself through, you are loved.

 

Be Blessed,
HB

 

 

5Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

And lean not on your own understanding;

6In all your ways acknowledge Him,

And He shall direct your paths.

~Proverbs 3 NKJV

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